That’s what I tell myself whenever I feel as if I just can’t take another shot of insulin, whether it’s because the neuropathy is particularly bad that day, or simply because 4 shots a day, plus any I have to take to regain control, becomes tiresome after a while.
Believe me, I appreciate every shot I can take to control my diabetes. I faithfully take my 4 shots, my 2,000mg of Metformin, and my Jardiance pill every day, like clockwork. I try to eat as healthy as I can afford. I don’t exercise very much, that’s on me, because I simply forget to set aside time for my exercise bike.
I don’t go for walks any more because it’s always either too hot, too humid, or not very safe. Our neighborhood has become progressively worse over time, and so I don’t risk walking alone anymore, even though I look like someone who can handle themselves.
I guess I’m just tired. You never realize how much of your life is planning meals around other people. When my family wants to come over and have dinner with me and dad, I have to know ahead of time when they’ll be here, what they’ll want, so I can properly plan out my shot schedule for the whole day.
Yeah, I plan out my shot schedule in the morning, as I don’t like to deviate from that schedule once I set to it. So, for example, if I take my shot at 9 AM, and my family wants to come over at 6 o’clock that evening and have dinner, that works because I can eat at 9 AM, then 1 PM, and then 6 PM and it not be any issue.
What usually catches me off guard is if there are no plans and I take my shot at, say, 11 AM (sometimes I can’t eat early in the day, I’m not a breakfast person), then they call and say “we’ll have dinner over at 5 PM!”) that means I can either take my shot a little early, around 1 or 2 PM, and then eat again at 5 PM, which crams too many meals into too short a time for me, or I can skip an afternoon meal, and eat at 5 PM, and then eat again at 8 or 9 PM.
That’s 3 meals a day, roughly spaced 4 to 6 hours apart maximum. I try to not eat any sooner than 4 hours because you really don’t want the previous shot and the next shot to mix, as that might cause a hypoglycemic episode (dangerously low blood sugar, which can lead to a coma and death).
I try not to eat more than 6 hours apart because I have found my blood sugar levels start to get erratic at that point, and I have to eat anything I have on me, which means a candy bar can ruin the chance for a meal later.
Some people have glucose pumps, but my particular insurance does not cover those, and even if they did, I really don’t like being so heavily dependent upon something so expensive living in a country where healthcare is seen as a for profit business opportunity rather than something every human being deserves regardless of ability to pay.
Now, none of this is any one’s fault. I love when my family visits, I like having dinner with them, and of course sometimes they can’t help when they come over, it’s just one more thing being diabetic has to take into account, is something so many people take for granted and don’t even realize.
So I just take my shots. Day after day after day after day after day, four times a day or more, injecting the insulin into my stomach day after day after day after day, the sharp sting of the so-called “comfort” needle, piercing time and time and time and time again, for breakfast, for lunch, for dinner, for bedtime.
You kind of get tired of it after a while, but what’s the alternative, you know?
.Red
